Three things I’ve thought a lot about:
Bellies: For the longest time, I was under the impression that only fat women had bellies (and, because I had one, even when I was a size 9, I must automatically be fat–and fat was always the worst thing ever).
I thought that women were supposed to look somewhat like this:
For some reason I believed that healthy=thin=beautiful=flat.
I spent countless time fretting over my belly, draping fabrics so that nobody could see it when I was sitting, and wondering why I was so cursed with such abhorrent anatomy.
Stretch Marks: I went through puberty early and quickly. The result? Lots of stretch marks while all my friends were still a foot shorter and 20 pounds lighter than me, not even bothered with having to buy bras or figure out pads/tampons yet. I was ashamed and embarrassed–I regarded each stretch mark as a personal failing.
Even after I figured out that I had just matured a little early, and I watched my friends follow suit, I still clung onto this sick notion that I was a failure for getting stretch marks, and, as the obvious conclusion, nobody would ever love me (romantically) because of them. I may have a slight flair for dramatics…
Insecurities: Over my life I have developed and conquered thousands of these (like the one up above), and there always seem to be more lurking around the corner.
What do bellies, stretch marks, and insecurities have in common?
Every woman’s got them!
Over the past year or so, as I’ve been finding myself I’ve also been seeing others more clearly as well.
Imagine my surprise, when, the more I looked,the more similarities I saw?
Nobody is completely confident 100% of the time.
Every woman I have become friends with has, over time, shared with me things that she worries about personally, and things she wishes were different about herself.
Everybody has insecurities! How crazy is that?
The other two took me longer to realize, but through conversations and mirrored dressing rooms, I started to realize that all the other women were like me as well.
In the middle of some girly conversation or other, one Greaser was complaining about her stretch marks, and another size tiny Greaser burst out with a laugh, “Everyone’s got stretch marks. I’ve got stretch marks!” This seems like a fairly simple statement, but to me it was a teeny bit earth-shattering. So, if everyone’s got them, that means they aren’t that big of a deal, right?
Once stretch marks were no longer taboo, bellies were quick to follow.
I started to notice that even the slimmest of women had teeny little curving bellies, and I had to discuss it with Y just to make sure I wasn’t seeing things. Since then I’ve come to the conclusion that bellies on women are beautiful, sexy, and feminine. Granted, I’m still working on shrinking all of me, but I am happy that I’ve got curves.
I love bellies!
Isn’t it funny, how little truths can take so long to discover?