I’ve written about falling into an exercise plateau, I’ve written about discovering (or, finally, giving in) to Jazzercise, and I most recently wrote about beginning to run. I have been honest in my struggles, in my inspirations, and in my battle for self esteem. I thought that I had learned how to motivate myself, how to keep myself fit, and how to eat well so that I feel well.
Then, I came up against an enemy far more formidable than I had been prepared to face: an office job in the winter in the Pacific Northwest. Eight hours of sitting a day (when I am not out traveling) combined with the windy cold and interminable grey of December in Western Washington has become the largest detriment to my health since Sophomore year of college. I have somehow miraculously avoided putting on weight, but I feel terribly squishy, lacking in energy, and physically unhappy. I am tapped out, and by the time I get home at night all I want to do is watch Netflix, take a bath, and go to bed.
This past week (and upcoming one) are especially painful, because while I have been in town I haven’t been able to Jazzercise because I have had to and still have to stay late at work to call students and find out if they really want to apply to Saint Martin’s.
I have decided (and I know I talk a lot, but I mean it!) to rebel against this festering seasonal slobbery and am going to make it to size 8 by the end of 2012. There is no reason why I cannot reach my ultimate goal this year, and stay there. This is not a resolution, I am forever failing at resolutions. Rather, it is a promise.
This health journey has been eye-opening, especially in view of the recent failures. I need inspiration, motivation, and accountability.
With my job I have free access to a wonderful gym, literally a five minute walk from my office door if I am wearing heels. I have not taken advantage of this since summer–I will no longer waste this luxury. I have an hour lunch break that I often spend lazing around, traveling from store to store listlessly trying to fulfill my yearning for something more by making purchases I could probably survive without. I will make an effort to spend at least half of my lunch breaks working out.
I’ve also done something a little reckless and out of character–I have agreed to play on the Staff Intramural Basketball team. They needed women, I needed structured exercise, and I think it will be a really fun way to hang out with colleagues and make a fool of myself. I should probably start studying up on the rules of Basketball….back when I was a Drum Major I could tell when to yell “offense” or “defense” and when a time out or quarter was coming up so that I could start a song, but I think I have since then pretty effectively wiped the rules of the game from my memory if I ever knew them.
In the search for workout inspiration, I was exposed to two magazines yesterday (at a Cookie party, nonetheless) that I am hoping will be a good reminder for me that I am not alone. I subscribed to two years of Clean Eating, and I am going to try out a digital subscription to Oxygen for a while. The first is chock-full of clean and devastatingly delicious looking recipes, and the second seems to be written for female competitive body-builders but has information for women at levels of health and fitness. While browsing Oxygen’s website to see if I was really interested, I came across a very helpful tip: once in a while I ought to reward myself for doing well, but with something other than food. Interesting! I know that all of the literature in the world cannot give me the will to work out, only I can, but as a visual learner I will find the reminder to be most helpful.
I don’t feel particularly bad that my slipping has hit the heaviest during the holiday season, I actually find it rather comically cliché. I am not upset with myself, but I can feel the difference physically and mentally. As another visual cue, and a source of encouragement, I am going to print out a picture of myself at my heaviest weight, and hang it next to a picture of where I am at now by my mirror. This will be a reminder of where I never want to return, and of how much I can accomplish when I, as the maker of my new running shoes would recommend, “just do it”.
P.S. Thanks to the two “S”s for recommending the mags.
P.P.S. Thanks to Y for Jazzercise.
P.P.P.S. Thanks to A and K for constantly recommending running, even if it took me years to believe you.
and finally, skipping the P’s and the S’s, a funny article in the New York times about how technology is ruining common plot devices.